woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
