the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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