I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
