She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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