Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Randomize
