Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
