totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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