I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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