I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
You have to summon your inner elephant
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Drunk is not a location!
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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