I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
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