she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
