Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
