yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
