No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
