thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
