Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
