sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
