apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
