Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
