He is such a slut. More and more my type.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Randomize
