"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
