My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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