nut hugger
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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