Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
