I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
