I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Congratulations! We have a period
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
