I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
