If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
So many bounce houses so little time
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
