Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
