i wish peter jackson would direct porn
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
