that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
