You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
