My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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