Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
