their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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