I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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