wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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