i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize
