How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
