Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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