I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Rumble strips road head = magical
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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