I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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