btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
