This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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