need another drink. this is the easiest way
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
