she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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