OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Are my feet made of real feet?
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
