No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
