ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize