so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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