so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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